A 24-year-old woman says she ended her relationship after her boyfriend told her he couldn’t see what value she brought to his life, leaving her questioning what to do next as she faces an unexpected pregnancy.
In a post on Reddit, user solite_ explained that while they had recently been discussing another couple, she suggested that the man likely keeps his partner in his life because she brings value to it.
But her 26-year-old boyfriend pushed back and began asking things like, “What value does a woman bring to a man?”
He then stunned her by asking her what value she thought she brought to his life.
“I told him that was a question only he could answer, and he said he doesn’t see it and he doesn’t know,” the OP wrote, “and he continued to ask me to tell him the value I brought.
“I told him I’m not answering that and that I won’t allow him to belittle me or make me feel less than.”
When she told him she would leave if she added no value to his life, he reportedly got upset and told her she had “wasted his time.”
She said she has since broken things off, but is pregnant and unsure whether to reopen the conversation if he reaches out.
Reddit users quickly rallied around the OP, with many focusing on the timing of his comments.
“You’re carrying his child and he’s asking you to tell him what value you bring to his life? That’s insane,” one Reddit user declared.
Another pointed out, “You should really determine if it’s early enough to have another option rather than saddling yourself for the next 18+ years to a guy who thinks women are worthless.”
“If you have a daughter, do you want her to think she has no value? If you have a son, do you want him to think women have no value?” one contributor asked.
“Do not get back with this man. He sounds like a red-pilled right-wing idiot.”
Misogynistic Relationships
The situation echoes themes described in an article by Brenda Branson for Focus on the Family titled “11 telltale signs you’re in a misogynistic relationship.”
The piece cites Dr. Margaret Rinck, who wrote in her book Christian Men Who Hate Women that such men are “men who need to control their wives more than they need their affirmation or admiration, men who are deeply dependent on their wives while at the same time harbouring a strong resentment.”
Rinck added that “Christian men who hate women are in some ways even more dangerous and destructive in their relationships than their non-Christian counterparts.”
The same article defines misogyny directly: “The word misogynist literally means hatred of women,” and adds that although some men claim to love their wives, “the actions of a misogynist indicate just the opposite.”
‘A lot of soul searching’
Questions about when to leave a troubled partnership are addressed in an article on Along Came Cherry titled “Unhappy Relationships: When Is It Time To Throw In The Towel?”
The piece notes: “Making the decision to throw in the towel isn’t an easy one. Just because there is conflict, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s time to leave.”
It advises readers to reflect carefully, adding: “The decision to end a relationship requires a lot of soul searching, and it’s important you try to develop some insight before coming to any rash conclusions.”
Newsweek has reached out to solite_ for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
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