Say what you will about Shiv Roy, one of the four scheming children of media mogul Logan Roy in the hit HBO show Succession, but she’s no pushover. Immediately after her billionaire father’s stroke wakes everyone to his inevitable mortality, Shiv, despite her lack of experience in business, starts jostling for power with her brothers, her husband, and assorted other men hungry to take over.
Though her approach isn’t always exemplary, Shiv steps up in a way that any woman set to inherit family wealth can learn from: by rolling up her sleeves, learning what she needs to know, and boldly asserting her needs and desires.
Last month I outlined the steps men can take to prepare their wives or daughters for inheriting their wealth. Today I’ll cover what happens if you’re one of those women, and the Logan Roy in your life did not sufficiently plan ahead. If you find yourself floundering in the deep end never having learned to swim, here’s a step-by-step guide to managing the chaos.
Get going today
A survey released by Bank of America last year found that 94 percent of women “believe that most women will be personally responsible for their finances at some point in their adult life.” Yet, a report from the World Economic Forum pointed out that only 12 percent of women who are expecting to inherit have talked with a financial advisor ahead of time.
A third of women, according to Bank of America, feel they lack the knowledge to have those important conversations—but their perceived knowledge deficit is in part just a lack of confidence. A 2021 study by the Global Financial Literacy Excellence Center found that women answered “do not know” to more multiple-choice questions than men did, but when that option was removed from the list of choices, the report asserted, “they frequently chose the correct answer.”
Another barrier for women has been that, despite decades of progress toward equality in the workplace, at home they are often still the primary caregivers for their children and for any elderly or disabled adults in the family. That’s in addition to careers, volunteer work, and social activities, so it can be hard to fit learning about finances into your day. The Bank of America survey also found that while overall around 14 percent of women say time is a factor in their lack of financial participation, that number goes up in lockstep with wealth. Only a tenth of those with a household income of under $50,000 cite overcrowded schedules, but once income reaches $250,000, the figure climbs to 18 percent.
Whatever is keeping you from getting more involved, you really must find the time to start. Make an appointment with yourself to spend one hour a week getting up to speed, both in general and regarding your family’s situation in particular. It may seem daunting at first, but it’s like developing a muscle: the more you work it, the easier working it will become. Eventually you’ll find yourself picking up information as if by osmosis.
There are lots of ways to break the ice. Perhaps the easiest is to search online for articles and videos created by banks, investment firms, and independent financial gurus. Once you’re ready for information in larger doses, seek out books on wealth management, particularly those geared toward women. Consider taking courses in financial planning, attend conferences and meetings, and network, network, network.
To learn more about your family’s finances specifically, tell your husband, parents, or other key relatives you’re interested; they’ll likely be glad to help you hit the ground running. Introduce yourself to advisors, staff and third-party vendors, request copies of important documents, and ask to be included in email threads and meetings. And once you begin to connect, don’t feel funny asking as many questions as you need to get the full picture; it’s the only way you’re going to learn.
When your inheritance involves a death
The reality of inheritances is that most happen after a loved one dies or experiences an incapacitating health event. An even more recent study from Bank of America suggests that $54 trillion, or almost half, of the “Great Wealth Transfer” will be transfers to surviving spouses, 95% of whom will be women. In a 2024 report, UBS refers to this as the horizontal wealth transfer, or wealth that will be transferred from one spouse to another. It is not pleasant to think about, but even in this case, the sooner you get started the better.
First, be proactive about talking with whoever will be passing down their wealth about stepping back before their official retirement and what will happen when they die. The conversation is not easy to have, but it’s necessary.
If you’ll be inheriting from your parents and no one in the family is geographically near them, consider changing this arrangement. If that’s impossible, visit as often as you can and stay in close touch by phone and video conferencing so you can keep an eye on things before any problems arise with their financial acuity. Make sure you have access to wills, medical directives, trust documents, insurance policies, and other important paperwork before it is needed, and discuss setting up a durable power of attorney to head off any problems that might arise from a medical emergency.
Before the ninth hour, make connections with your parents’ attorneys, financial advisors, and tax advisors, and get legal and tax advice of your own. Reaching out to develop a personal relationship with these professionals can smooth the way not only when a big change occurs, but with myriad smaller changes along the way.
Make sure any pertinent mail is redirected or copied to you, and that when the time comes, you’ll have access to necessary paperwork. Consider getting at least one joint account with your parent, to make moving money between you easier. Ask him or her to officially request you be kept in the loop on workplace savings accounts; notices from banks, brokerages, and other financial institutions; lawyers, financial advisors, and so forth. Keep a list of your parents’ usernames and passwords and ask them to update you if any change.
Once a death or major health event occurs, consider getting a tax ID and bank account for the estate; contact credit-card, insurance, and mortgage companies to pay off and close accounts where applicable; notify credit bureaus; and cancel memberships, subscriptions, and services.
If you’ll be inheriting from your husband, you may need to take the additional step of contacting Social Security, Medicare, and his employer about continuing to receive benefits for you and your children. Also, if there’s a real-estate portfolio, contact the property manager, if there is one, and talk with an accountant about the tax implications of selling versus collecting monthly rents.
Finally, if you don’t want to deal with the deluge of financial info on your own, start shopping for a personal CPA who can help you with it. That will leave you free to make executive decisions rather than keeping nitpicky balance sheets.
Perhaps the most important thing to keep in mind while embarking on this new and unfamiliar journey: You’ve got this.
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