A memo written by former President Joe Biden has resurfaced in the wake of President Donald Trump’s decision to miss his son’s wedding.
Trump confirmed in a post shared to Truth Social on Friday that he would be unable to attend the nuptials of his son Don Jr. and Bettina Anderson, which took place over Memorial weekend, due to “circumstances pertaining to Government and my love for the United States of America.”
The decision stood in stark contrast to the sentiment of a memo issued by his predecessor. In 2014, ahead of Thanksgiving, Biden sent a memo to staff reminding them he did not want them to “miss or sacrifice important family obligations for work.”
What Did Biden’s Memo About Work Say?
Biden’s memo is dated November 7, 2014, when he was serving as vice president under former President Barack Obama. The memo, addressed to his “wonderful staff”, says: “I would like to take a moment and make something clear to everyone. I do not expect nor do I want any of you to miss or sacrifice important family obligations for work.”
The memo goes on to list the “family obligations” this refers to, but is “not limited to,” which include “family birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, any religious ceremonies such as first communions and bar mitzvahs, graduations, and times of need such as illness or a loss in the family.”
“This is very important to me,” Biden writes. “In fact, I will go so far as to say that if I find out that you are working with me while missing important family responsibilities, it will disappoint me greatly.”
According to the unearthed memo, this has been an “unwritten rule” since Biden’s time in the Senate. He signs off “Thank you all for the hard work.”
‘Tells you all you need to know’
The memo was posted to Threads by former U.S. Public Delegate to the United Nations Andrew Weinstein, an Obama and Biden appointee.
“Joe Biden once wrote a memo saying he’d be disappointed if staff missed family milestones for work. Donald Trump is skipping his son’s wedding this weekend,” Weinstein wrote alongside the memo. “Tells you all you need to know.”
His post was viewed 391,000 times on Threads, earning over 15,000 likes.
“For all his faults, Biden may have been the most empathetic President we have ever had,” one user commented. A Trump critic wrote: “He can’t even make the effort for his own family, Trump is all about himself.”
Some defended Trump’s decision to remain at the White House though.
“There’s a difference between being a staffer and being POTUS,” they wrote.
Why Did Trump Miss His Son’s Wedding?
Trump’s Truth Social post explaining his absence from Don Jr’s wedding said: “While I very much wanted to be with my son, Don Jr., and the newest member of the Trump Family, his soon to be wife, Bettina, circumstances pertaining to Government, and my love for the United States of America, do not allow me to do so,”
Trump continued: “I feel it is important for me to remain in Washington, D.C., at the White House during this important period of time. Congratulations to Don and Bettina! President DONALD J. TRUMP.”
When asked by reporters at the White House earlier last week, Trump also hinted at tensions with Iran being a key consideration behind the decision. Trump said: “He’d [Don Jr.] like me to go. It’s going to be a small private affair. I’m gonna try and make it. I said, ‘This is not good timing for me. I have a thing called Iran and other things.'”
He continued: “That’s one I can’t win on. If I do attend, I get killed. If I don’t attend, I get killed…by the fake news, of course.”
Biden’s Commitment to Family Time
Biden spoke about his focus on family during an address to students at Yale University Class Day in 2015 and how it was shaped by the tragic loss of his first wife, Neilia, and their 1-year-old daughter Naomi, just six weeks after he became the second-youngest man to be elected to the Senate in 1972.
Neilia, Naomi and Biden’s two sons Beau and Hunter, who were 3 and 2 at the time, were out Christmas shopping when the car they were in was hit by a tractor trailer. His wife and daughter were killed, while Beau and Hunter sustained serious injuries and there were doubts over whether they would survive.
Biden told students how his mom consoled him, saying: “Joey, out of everything terrible that happens to you, something good will come if you look hard enough for it.”
That something was the bond he fostered with his sons through a commitment to regular family time.
From then on, Biden commuted four hours a day by train from Wilmington, Delaware, to Washington, D.C.
“I did it because I wanted to be able to kiss them goodnight and kiss them in the morning the next day,” he told students at Yale.
Biden would go on to marry Jill Biden, his second wife, in 1977. A daughter, Ashley, followed in 1981. His commitment to family time continued.
Does Trump Prioritize Family?
An argument can certainly be made that Trump makes an effort to integrate family into his professional and political life. Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner served as senior advisers to the president in the past while both his sons are involved in a variety of Trump’s business ventures.
Speaking about his younger years Eric Trump, the youngest of his two sons, during a 2006 interview with The New York Times said his older brother, Don Jr., had “always been my best friend, a mentor…In a way, he raised me. My father, I love and I appreciate, but he always worked 24 hours a day.”
In a 2004 interview with New York magazine, Don Jr. also revealed how he stopped speaking to his father for a year after discovering he had cheated on his mom, Ivana, with Marla Maples. Maples herself, meanwhile, told People in 2016 that she effectively raised their daughter Tiffany Trump as a “single mother.”
“Her daddy is a good provider with education and such, but as far as time, it was just me,” Maples, said. “Her father wasn’t able to be there with day-to-day skills as a parent. He loves his kids. There’s no doubt. But everything was a bit of a negotiation.”
More recently, in 2012, First Lady Melania Trump spoke warmly about Trump’s “beautiful relationship” with their son, Barron, despite the fact he is “very busy.”
“He spends quality time with Barron. They have a beautiful relationship full of respect and love,” she told Parenting.com. “There they play golf, spend time together, eat dinner together, and we enjoy family time. It is always a really special time.”
She did add that Trump “didn’t change diapers” when Barron was younger but she was ” completely fine with that” and it was “not important” to her.
Newsweek has contacted the Bidens and White House for comment.
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