An Idaho mom of three has opened up about the time when children grow up and slowly step into lives of their own.
Elise Franklin, 43, reflected on this transition after revisiting an old video from years ago—one that captured her driving with her three young kids piled into the car.
“I look back at this time with a lot of fondness,” Franklin told Newsweek. “They needed me, but not as much as a newborn or young toddler. I would say this was my favorite time of my kids’ lives.”
Franklin said one of the most-painful parts of watching children become adults is seeing them face challenges she can no longer fix.
Unlike when they were little, those struggles are often private—and without the shared support parents relied on in earlier years, that distance can feel lonely.
For Franklin, motherhood was the dream. She always pictured herself raising a family, long before adulthood came into focus.
“It was in my nature; I felt it at a young age,” Franklin said. “Lots of kids dream about future careers. I made lists of baby names I liked and dreamed what my future husband and family would be like.”
Today looks very different: Franklin’s eldest daughter, 22, is getting married; her middle son, 20, is serving a mission in El Salvador; and her youngest son, 16, is learning to drive.
Franklin called this stage of motherhood a “beautiful heartbreak” in a reel on Instagram (@frankly_elise). It is marked by pride and loss, and one she feels people rarely talk about because it centers on adult children.
“It’s a little bit heartbreaking to not have them need you in ways that you were used to being needed for so long,” Franklin said. “I loved being the carpool mom. I never complained about needing to drive my kids to anything and everything. I loved our time in the car ’cause it’s where they really opened up.”
Now, Franklin said she jokingly invites him out for drinks or food just to reclaim that car time.
Still, the mom of three is hopeful. She is savoring the final years of her youngest’s childhood, rediscovering her own interests and embracing a renewed closeness with her husband, Dan.
“I’m so excited to see my kids start their own families in the future,” Franklin said. “Family is everything. I am excited for grandchildren when they come! I hope my kids will live close enough to me so I can be a ‘carpool grandma’.”
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