A woman who married her long-term partner after a decade together has revealed why the marriage ended just eight months later.
Lindsay Bloom, 31, of California, shared that, while she and her ex husband had spent more than 10 years building a life together, therapy led her to the realization that their relationship had been holding her back.
“We were very young when we first started dating, and, for both of us, it was our first real relationship,” Bloom told Newsweek. “We quickly became each other’s safe spaces. Because of that, I think we both chose to ignore the red flags that had been there from the start.”
According to Bloom, the pair spent much of their relationship arguing—not explosively, but through “constant bickering.” Despite recognizing that they weren’t a good match, she said that both of them prioritized comfort and familiarity over facing life apart.
“As time went on, the idea of being without each other seemed impossible. After 10 years, we both thought, ‘Well, if we’re not going to get married, what are we even doing here?'” Bloom said.
The couple tied the knot after more than a decade together, but Bloom said she hoped the wedding would bring her a sense of clarity. Instead, it left her feeling “more lost than ever.”
The Turning Point
Struggling with her mental health, Bloom began attending therapy, which she credits with helping her “rediscover her inner voice.”
“During those six months, I worked relentlessly on finding that voice,” she said. “And the funny thing is, we never even touched on my relationship until the very end. Looking back, I was avoiding facing the reality of it.”
Eventually, Bloom realized that the relationship was no longer working for her.
“When that light switched on, I knew immediately I could never go back to who I was before,” she said. “Staying in the relationship wouldn’t have been fair to either of us. We had both been numb for so long—I was just the one who woke up first.”
No Regrets, Just Growth
Bloom emphasized that she holds no bitterness toward her ex husband.
“I don’t regret anything about the 11 years we spent together. We grew up together, learned how to do life together, and experienced a level of friendship that many people won’t ever have,” she said. “After everything, I feel lucky to have spent those years with someone I will always love and respect.”
Calling the split both the “hardest” and “best” thing she has ever done, Bloom said choosing to leave was ultimately an act of self-love.
“When I chose to finally let go of comfort in favor of living my truth, I chose myself in the biggest way I possibly could have. And by doing so, I set us both free,” she said.
After her divorce, Bloom decided to share her story publicly to help others in similar situations feel less alone. On TikTok, videos about her experience have gone viral, and many people have since shared their own experiences.
“Once I started talking about it, I realized so many people have gone through something similar, but it’s still so stigmatized,” Bloom said. “If I’d seen someone talk about this sooner, I think the light would’ve turned on long before there ever was a marriage.”
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