A man has sparked debate online after asking women whether they would want to take their husband’s last name after marriage and why.
Jason Perry, who goes by @jason.yrrep on Threads, wrote: “As I recognize that a lot of women don’t choose to be identified by their husband’s last name, unless it benefits them in some way…Do you want to take the last name of your husband, or do you want to keep your last name…and why?”
Newsweek reached out to @jason.yrrep via Instagram direct message for comment.
Perry added that he wasn’t sure he would marry a woman who refused to adopt his surname. At the time of writing, the post has received over 4,200 likes, comments and shares.
Some users supported the tradition and tied it to faith and unity. One woman wrote: “I want to take my husband’s last name because I become a part of him and his family. To me it will be an honor and a privilege.”
Another echoed a similar perspective: “Yes I’ll change my name, it signifies my new covenant with my husband, that’s important to us both. The Bible teaches us to leave our family, our father, and cleave to our spouse.”
Many others, however, questioned why the expectation typically falls on women. “No man will ever convince me that his last name is more important to me than mine,” one user wrote. “Additionally, why are women the only ones who are required to literally change their identities in order to be coupled?”
Career identity was another common theme. “I will keep my last name. I run my own practice,” one commenter said. “Everything I have achieved has been done on my name and I am proud of that…I would hope that I will marry a man whose sense of identity and self worth in our relationship is not anchored to his surname.”
Some shared personal or sentimental reasons. One woman listed hers bluntly: “3 things, in order: My husband didn’t get the PhD I did, my name stays. It’s the last thing I have left of my dad who died when I was 16. My last name is cooler. And…my husband doesn’t give a c*** because he loves me for far more than just a last name.”
Some couples described compromises. One woman said her husband valued a shared surname, but reconsidered when asked if he would change his. They ultimately split the tradition: their sons carry his surname and their daughter carries hers.
As the debate grew, Perry later added a follow-up and shared how he didn’t expect the “onslaught of insults, slander and hate filled comments.”
He added that he appreciated the feedback, regardless of whether he agreed or not.
“I’m an American, so I have American values,” Perry wrote. “And, I’m a Christian, so I don’t expect love or agreement from those who don’t share my faith. But, I would appreciate if people were more respectful.”
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