A man says he feels “disrespected” and pushed out of his own home after his girlfriend brought home an 8-week-old puppy despite his clear objections.
The 32-year-old man, as Reddit user ThrowRASimple7, explained that he and his 29-year-old girlfriend moved into a one bedroom apartment together after a year of dating.
The original poster (OP) said he pays most of the rent and expenses and had made it clear he was not ready to take on the responsibility of raising a puppy.
Girlfriend’s Surprise
“I like dogs,” he wrote, explaining that he would be open to adopting an older dog in the future. But as someone who works from home, he said he did not have time to take a young pooch outside every 45 minutes.
When he returned home one day, he found an, “8-week-old yellow lab,” waiting for him.
Because his girlfriend works in an office, he has taken on the bulk of the care during the first week. While he described the puppy as “great,” he admitted that the constant attention is “starting to kill me.”
The OP shared that his girlfriend has taken accountability, promised to handle all puppy responsibilities and vowed never to make a similar decision without him. She has also said she will not rehome the dog.
“A few weeks ago, I thought this was the woman I was going to marry,” he confided to Redditors.
Now, he added, “I can’t even stand being in my own home. I find any excuse to leave.”
‘Zero respect’
Among almost 900 Reddit comments, a supporter reassured the OP he was, “Not unreasonable at all. Animals need to be agreed upon, especially when they’ll live for 8-plus years.
“Unfortunately your relationship may be over anyway. You either keep the dog and resent her, or you make her give away the dog and she resents you. However this may be a good thing since she showed you she has zero respect for your feelings and is financially irresponsible.”
The OP replied: “I’m reading this as I take the puppy for a long walk [laugh out loud]. This is pretty much exactly how I feel about the situation. There will be resentment either way and we all know where that will lead.”
Another pundit questioned how the dog was obtained, writing: “Yuck. It would be more understandable if she’d unexpectedly found a stray and wanted to help it, but given that its a yellow lab puppy, I’m guessing she bought it from a breeder?
“She probably got on a waiting list, saved her money, all the while choosing not to say anything because she knew you weren’t ready. Your opinion was just a hurdle for her to get around, not something to respect.”
Relationship experts say major decisions that affect both partners require mutual agreement.
In an article for Hey Sigmund, Karen Young wrote: “Big decisions are for important people. And clearly, you’re not one of them.”
She added that, “If you’re sharing your life with someone, it’s critical that you have a say in the decisions that will affect you.”
Breach of Trust
Conflict itself is not unusual, according to Loveisrespect, a nonprofit focused on dating abuse prevention. “Conflict exists in all relationships,” the organization states. It adds that, “Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, even during an argument.”
For ThrowRASimple7, the question remains whether this breach of trust is something the relationship can recover from, or whether the resentment he fears will continue to grow inside the small apartment he no longer feels comfortable calling home.
Newsweek has reached out to ThrowRASimple7 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
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