U mad, bro?
Daters who’ve swiped through the apps have seen it too many times — men who make a point of listing their height right up front, along with the eye-roll-inducing phrase, “because apparently that matters.”
Seasoned love-seekers have long mocked the bio cliché as an instant swipe-left — and according to an expert, that’s the smart move.
In a recent essay, Cosmopolitan’s Associate Sex & Relationships Editor Kayla Kibbe warned that the seemingly offhand comment is actually a window into a guy’s mindset — and a red flag.
“They’re making a presumption about what all women want and painting us with the same passive-aggressive brush,” she explains.
Essentially, by announcing their height in this passive-aggressive fashion, these guys are letting you know that they’re operating under the sexist assumption that all women are shallow or height-obsessed.
And they’re not, Kibbe insists — saying that while the men aren’t entirely off-base, they’re directing their frustration, or even anger, where it doesn’t belong.
“The belief these men are responding to isn’t totally unfounded,” she conceded, “[but] the height standard to which many men seem to feel subjected is not one that was devised by women but rather one imposed on us all by internalized patriarchal beliefs.”
Besides, Kibbe said, men over six feet theoretically have nothing to complain about — and the fact that they’re complaining anyway isn’t a great look.
“But in flaunting their good fortune under the guise of faux-humility, ‘because apparently that matters,’ they’re still fueling this narrative by leaning into a judgmental assumption about the unreasonable standards all women supposedly demand of men and shaming us for it in the process,” she said.
The height obsession on both sides of the dating aisle isn’t new.
The Post previously reported on the 6-6-6 rule some women are following – 6 feet tall, six-figure salary, six-pack abs — an unrealistic trifecta that supposedly separates the studs from the duds.
While women are using it to filter through the seemingly endless lineup of potential matches, experts warn that such rigid standards could leave you swiping right into loneliness.
Amber Soletti, a dating expert who has hosted hundreds of singles events, said it’s fine to have non-negotiables, but they should be rooted in deeper values.
“If you try to compromise on those types of deal-breakers, you are going to end up in a relationship with a lot of arguing, resentment and eventual demise,” she told The Post.
Judith Gottesman, a matchmaker and dating coach, agreed, telling The Post that “what matters is the connection you have and that you respect, trust and love each other.”
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